Times are Changing...

It just amazes me how much having kids can totally screw things up...

I don't really mean that in a bad way, I'm just getting frustrated.  Kids have this unbelievable way of realizing a routine is figured out and starts actually working well, and then they need to switch shit up...

For instance our schedule had been working perfectly for almost a month (as long as Laney isn't up all night) where she goes to bed around 7:30, I feed her once around midnight 1am, then she sleeps til 5:30 or so.  This meant my alarm went off at 3:30am, I hit snooze til almost 4am and I was up and on the treadmill by 4:15.  I'd get at least a 20 minute run before doing my cool down of preparing lunch and bottles for the day.

Well the last few days Laney has decided that she likes getting up about 4:30 rather than 5:30.  And it didn't matter what time she last ate.  Monday I at least got in a 15 minute run, but yesterday and today she woke up just as I was getting ready to get on the treadmill.

There is no way in hell I'm getting up earlier to work out.  Especially if I can't go to bed any earlier and there's no guarantee I'm going to get to sleep through the night.

This post could be full of excuses, but it's not going to be.  The fact is, I need to figure out a new routine to get things back in gear.  The only "excuse" I find even remotely acceptable is not getting enough sleep.  The fact is I just can't function on less that 6 hours of sleep, especially if it's consistently only 6 hours.  My body tends to need 7-8 or I'm falling asleep at my desk.

So my plan of attack for tonight is to get my lunch and bottles done so that I have an extra 15-20 minutes in the morning to do some sort of exercise.

Along with the changing theme, my clothes are changing too... I bought this last week, but was too self conscious to wear it...

Today I bit the bullet because I had to look professional.  Hooker boots always say professional, don't they?
I've actually had several compliments today and it feels good :-)

I did realize that I need to work on my sweater options in my closet though.  I love the way sweaters look, hate the way they feel.  I need to find some nice (cheap) sweaters that are cozy and not scratchy.

The Crap Shoot Of Life

I had all intentions of turning things around this week.  And my intention was to start on Saturday.  *Notice the use of the word intentions*  Since I was a single mom Saturday, things didn’t really pan out.  I was still feeling the effects of the depression from Friday (which a nice long run would have done wonders for) and both girls got up at the crack ass of dawn.  Really, they were both up by 7am, and yes as much as I want this, I’m not getting my ass out of bed before 6am on a Saturday or Sunday.

Then plans changed drastically.  I was supposed to watch my 11 and 2 year old cousins while my aunt and uncle attended a banquette for my mom’s pool and poker leagues.  Turns out one of the kids wasn’t feeling well.  So mom, wonderful mom that she is, offered to buy me drinks if I could find a sitter.  After several hours of trying, I came up empty handed.

Then it was Pocca (my sister, Monica) to the rescue!  She wasn’t feeling up to going out so she drove all the way home from school to watch the girls for the night so I could go out.  She’s my hero!

I had a blast!  I can honestly say I was the best looking girl in the bar, except for the one 16 year old that came in to pick up her mom.  Many of the people I hadn’t seen since having baby number one.  All the compliments I received were awesome and so welcomed, I don’t think you could have punched the smile off my face!  Here I am enjoying a treat at the end of the night…

Sunday brought on Football, where I could have eaten better, but it was pretty much all I ate all day so I didn’t really care, plus I was a little hung over.  I was happy to get a nap during the game though.

And then the real shit storm started.  Laney was up most of the night Sunday night.  I didn’t get one straight hour of sleep.  She was up when my alarm went off at 3:30 and she was still up when I normally start my workout at 4 and still up again when I’m normally showering at 5.  Needless to say I didn’t work out, or shower…  I did take her to the doctor Monday, but Monday night wasn’t the best either.  Although I did at least get to sleep in my bed for an hour straight.  I didn’t get up to work out and then woke up freaking out at 5:50 because I fell asleep feeding her at 4:30 (after turing my alarm off) and only had 30 minutes to get out the door.  Last night was a little better, but by 2am she was screaming out every half hour or so trying to comfortable.  Yeah, no workout today either.  I’m running on fumes and wondering if this little story here is even going to make sense when I’m done.  And honestly I’m not going to go back and read it, I might fall asleep right here if I do.

So here’s to hoping for more sleep tonight and the strength to get my ass out of bed in the morning…

Form

I can’t believe Thursday is going to be day 30 of the 30 Day Shred!  This is the first workout with a time line that I think I’ve actually stuck with.  Even the C25K in the end I didn’t do that last 2 weeks of training, but still ended being able to run the 30 minutes.  And yes, it may have actually taken me 36 days, but that’s besides the point.

Saturday I got so busy around the house I actually forgot to work out.  I know sounds crazy, but by the time I realized I hadn’t worked out yet, it was bed time.  I spent the entire day going through my clothes in the closet and cooking.  Lots of up and down, on and off.

Sunday I busted my ass at the workout.  I pushed myself and felt good about it, I was weak when I was done.  But as the day went on my shoulder got sore and yesterday it felt like it was on the verge of either being a pulled muscle or a pinched nerve again.  I didn’t want to risk it.  Plus my arms still felt like jello.  B reminded me that you can push yourself too hard and that’s not good either.

So today I slowed myself down and focused on my form.  I hadn’t really been focusing so much on form as I was trying to push myself to get the most calories I could out of the workout.  This morning though I realized more of my muscles actually felt effected.  I’m wondering if my overall results would have been better if I had focused more on my form than on my ability to keep up.  I’m hoping my results are going to be better than what I think they are from seeing myself from day to day in the mirror.

In other “form” words, I’m not so embarrassed to wear form fitting clothes anymore.  In other words, I actually HAVE a form other than round!  The 3 adults I saw this morning on my way to work (hubby, sitter 1 and sitter 2) all complimented me and said some variation of “You look good today.”  This pleased me.  I haven’t really dressed up for work in quite some time, although since coming back after Laney was born my dress has been more professional that hoodies and jeans.

It's hard to see but the skirt has small white and brown lines in it.

Compliment or Not?

A little background... I have an aunt and uncle who are pretty open about their lives, and I mean every part.  Any way, they like attention and to talk about themselves.  They've tried changing their diets several times over the last 10 years or more and nothing ever sticks.  I get it, I know it's hard and every day I tell myself that this time it HAS to be for good.  So this is what happened...

We are all hanging out at my mom's camp on the 4th of July.  This is the first time several of them have seen me in at least a month and a couple since I was pregnant.  Well above uncle says to me (when we are in a large group and rather loudly) "Brandi, have you lost weight?"  I said "I have, thanks for..." He cuts me off with "I've lost 8lbs this month, your aunt has only lost 6 though, even though we are eating the same."

I have so many issues with this.  First off, if you are going to compliment someone for their weight loss, don't just use it as an excuse to bring up your own.  Yes I know the first 2, 4, 6, whatever lbs is hard, but it's sticking with it that is even harder.  I had lost 20lbs at that time and I was proud.  Second, my poor aunt was right there and I could tell by the look on her face the fact that he mentioned that he was losing weight faster bothered her.  As if losing weight isn't hard enough?  If you aren't in a competition, don't make it one.

So anyway, I'm pretty sure he just mentioned my weight loss so that he could bring up his own.  Personally I never mention mine because to me if you can't see the difference what's the point?